5.06.2007

Friday June 23, 1944

I had expected that the end of the week will be such a busy day. I just had the camp workers this week and since yesterday we’ve all worked double time to harvest the beets before the weekend. Next year, with the extra money I’ve saved from the last two years will need to be invested in purchasing a machine that will help the farm harvest beets faster and use less manual labor in the process. If the workers are still able to help next year, I will be able to use them to plant more crops in other parts of the farm. At present, the beets are the toughest produce to harvest but will bring in the best price. I’ll just have to really account for every expense so that even if I do make a big purchase next spring, I will still have some money left in the bank.

I’ve helped in this farm since I can remember and now have been running it solo for three years. It’s been a learning experience the last few years and Hank had been a great mentor for me especially since I have to learn every area of keeping the farm profitable. The operation is so much easier now. It used to be such a daunting task. Although I’ve worked here even before I graduated from high school, running the farm by myself is a different matter than when Pa and Daniel were here. I think now that everything is almost as predictable as the weather, I see myself getting home early and feeling some kind of void in my life.

I know Martha and Hank have been worried about my lack of interest in getting married. It is not only them but some people in our community as well, like Mrs. Pratt and Mrs. Case and of course the Reverend. I know they all care for me. It’s not that this has not crossed my mind. After we had lost Daniel, I have mourned him so much. Between the two of us, he was the one who had the sociable and charismatic personality. If he had lived, he probably would be married and with kids by now. He held so much promise. I now felt all the weight of carrying our legacy and name onwards.

I’ve always admired my parents for the marriage they had and have dreamed of having one just like it. I admit, living and working in this farm makes it almost impossible to find the one person I can share my life with. I do try by going to dances and church potlucks. There aren’t really many of them left since the war started to begin with, they are either committed or already married and of course she can’t be just anyone, she has to be the right one. I still believe that one day I’ll meet her and I will just know it in my heart that she’s the one. I do.